I was born to be a momma. That’s what I told them, baby blue, I told them that straight away. It ain’t about the grant, it ain’t about nothing like that. I just wanted a baby of my own, a little soft baby to look after, to love and hold. That’s all I want.
So they gave me the test, they gave me you, baby blue. Oh, what a strange bundle you were, all warm and wriggly, just like a real baby, a little blue baby. No matter, I can look after a baby, real or blue, I’ll pass any old test. I held you and I fed you, I burped you and I washed you. Nothing to it, day in, day out, all night, all day. What a happy baby, you’re acing that old test, people said. You’ll be getting the permit any day, any day, that’s what they’d say.
Oh, my baby blue, my little bluebell. You and I, what a great team we made, for that test, that big old test. Look at mommy’s letter, right here it says: “Congratulations! You passed the parenthood competency test.” Competency, what a big word, my bluebird! Can you say competency? What a good girl you are! “Please return testing device BLU-1551 to your nearest reproduction control centre to receive your permit”, now that’s a bit of tosh. Return my little Blue Belle, return my little treasure? Not a chance, my baby blue, not even a tiny chance.
I was born to be a momma, you see, and you were made to be my little baby. My tiny little blue baby.